The Importance Of Strong Boundaries
Quote
“Your personal boundaries protect the inner core of your identity and your right to choice
-Gerard Manley Hopkins
When working with my clients, a challenge they often share is being able to set clear boundaries. Boundaries are like an imaginary fence you build around yourself. This fence provides protection and resistance against stress, anxiety, burnout, low self-worth and depression.
You need strong boundaries for balance, self-protection and self- respect. You also need them for building and maintaining healthy relationships with family, friends and co-workers.
Because we are natural caregivers, setting boundaries is often a struggle for us. When others ask for help, we find it difficult to refuse. Sometimes when we set boundaries, they may be inconsistent.
Opportunities to practice setting boundaries show up at home, in the office, with friends or family, and within us.
Here are some examples that indicate you may need to set clearer and stronger boundaries:
• You say yes when you want to say no (disease to please)
• You struggle with being assertive and communicating your feelings
• You give in because you do not want to experience any conflict or resistance in your life
• You find yourself stressed and overwhelmed by life
• You are exhausted spiritually, emotionally and physically
• You are always doing for everyone else, leaving no time or energy for you
Having poor boundaries is the number one reason why many women feel stressed, overwhelmed, resentful and joyless. Without the protection of boundaries other people will continue to run your life.
When you begin to establish and strengthen your boundaries, your life will not change overnight. Boundaries take time to develop and setting them may make you uncomfortable at first. Hang in there and don’t give up. Being consistent and thinking positive will go a long way in developing healthy and strong boundaries.
Stay tuned for my next article and I will share some tips on how you can start strengthening your boundaries, immediately.
Peggy’s Pick
Click this link http://dougkelley.podomatic.com/ and listen to the two-part podcast on Healthy Boundaries.
If you’re struggling with saying No, being a people pleaser, and challenged with setting clear healthy boundaries, then email me at peggy@seekingbalance.ca for a thirty minute complimentary session. Get started today in developing boundaries that strengthen and empower you as a mom, woman and business owner.
